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Friday, August 20, 2010

Fun with 4 LOKO

I've spoken before on here about 4 Loko and how crazy that jungle juice will get you.  It's been spreading like wild fire here in my hometown and a lot of people have had to find out the hard way just how drunk this stuff will get you.  I thought I would share some of recent photos that either I've take or my friends have taken whilst enjoying this liquid heroine.  I have redone everyone's face to protect their identity and try and save whatever respect they may think they still have in the community... Enjoy

This is my wife enjoying a little quality time with 4 Loko on our way down to the beach a few weeks ago.  Looks like a baby sheep getting a little bit of mother's milk...

Please note that she only had half a can of this stuff and I wouldn't trust her behind the wheel of a forklift. 

Me on the other hand... I was in the next seat over, busy at the controls of a vehicle traveling at 70 mph while enjoying 24 ounces of my very own fruit punch mixture.  Very relaxing...

Be advised that BeastHammer, LLC does not encourage or promote drinking and driving.  I am a trained professional, please do not try and duplicate anything you see on this site.

Nothing too exciting going on here... Just wanted to represent correctly during Discovery Channel's Shark Week.

This is Randy... the self proclaimed Godfather of the 4 Loko movement in North America.  The guy seriously doesn't start any drinking event without at least one 4 Loko to lube up the pipes.  He was able to turn a nice day out on the my brother's boat into an absolute sh*t show... I'm proud of this guy.

Here he is again... showing everyone some of his early childhood gang signs.  He is very hood. 

Here are my two friends Stephen and Pope.  Not really sure what happened after I snapped this photo as I was busy dry heaving in the sink from too much man-love exposure.  God bless this two. 

This last picture is my favorite because when looking at it, all one sees are some friends hanging out before the Zac Brown Band concert last week trying to engage in a little much needed fellowship. I'm sure they probably hung out in the parking lot, sharing some of their favorite Zac Brown "Chicken Fried" lyrics before entering the concert, enjoying the show and returning home. To the untrained eye you might believe that story but to someone who is in the 4 Loko game you know damn well that is not what happened.  Public Event + 2 or more friends + 4 Loko = COMPLETE MADNESS.  One of the guys who had never had this drink before drank 2 of them (48oz) clearly underestimating their power, he passed out and never even made it from the parking lot to the concert.  Another guy was in the same boat except he was able to make it into the show... that's one step closer to being able to pull this thing off than the other guy.  All he has to do is keep his composure and watch the show.  Easier said than done... About half-way through the show he decides it is culturally acceptable to whip out his wiener, put his hands on his hips and have himself a good long pee right there in front of everyone who is standing in the lawn seat section.  I SAY BRAVO!  His wife did not find it amusing at all however and I have still not gotten confirmation on their marital arrangements moving forward. 

                                    PLEASE ENJOY 4 LOKO RESPONSIBLY


randy said...

look at all those beautiful happy faces! 4 loko is tha ish-nish! 4 loko will get u so so so saucey! i do drank 4lokos and i do get stupid, if u have ever had one you know what i mean! if you have ever had more than one you will def show ur ass... u might say well i had almost 2 of them and i didnt show my ass, and to that i say oh u DID show ur ass u were just too foozed up to remember, just as ur friends! Dont forget the post where 4 loko cost me an i-phone and a girlfriend, but the best part about those 2 things is if u wait a little while u can get a new and improved version, just look the new i-phone 4 just came out and... uhhh well like i said the new i-phone 4 came out.

BeastHammer said...

So true Randy, you just need to find a good girl who enjoys watching you get wasted on gas station malt liquor just waiting for later when you spray fart all over her.

Wifey said...

Thanks for making me look like a dude asshole

BeastHammer said...

What u talkin bout Willis?

BeastHammer said...

haha thats great you do look like a man... i mean ur face does... i mean ur face in the picture looks like a man, the one that i had drawn over ur face looks like a man, not ur real face... i love u baby!

Anonymous said...

How is that stuff legal? It should be closely regulated and only available in ABC stores.

angry in aberdeen said...

anonymous, u better watch ur mouth, im a grown a$$ man and i will slap the $#!+ out of u if u ever talk about 4 loko like that again. regulating what i drink... what are we in prison or america, it called freedom u d@#che bag!!
ps. im not mad im just disappointed in u!

John, formerly anonymous said...

Your right angry in aberdeen, what am I thinking? I sound like a democrat. My mother would be very dissapointed in me encouraging more government. She didnt raise me that way. I sould be promoting republican views like a good southerner would. But I'm not here to talk politics. I'm here to express my approval of the beasthammer organization's promotion of this powerfull drug/drink. See, I myself have enjoyed this devil juice. In fact, I am featured in the story above. It is a quick and easy way to ruin a good evening with friends. Please forgive my temporary lack of judgement in the earlier post. I will not let it happen again.
ps. im sorry i let you down
pss. that is very clever use of random characters to represent less desirable words

BeastHammer said...

You two should squash this over a 24oz Four Loko with two bendy straws.

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