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Thursday, August 12, 2010

Fantasy Baseball Smack Talk

So I'm in a fantasy baseball league this year with about 5 guys I know and 5 guys I don't.  Today one of these people I don't know decided it was a good idea to start running his mouth to me on the message board. There hasn't really been any trash talking so I thought this was funny today.  I'll save everyone the boring fantasy baseball jargon but basically I posted a message yesterday letting the league know that I had a player available from my team that I didn't need so if anyone could use him they just had to make me a trade offer.  Should be a take it or leave it situation but this jerkoff decided he would go the extra mile... the exchange is below and yes these are actual team names from my league (Kenny Powers Mullet is my friend Brent and Korean Potato Eaters is the Douche Bag):
BeastHammer, LLC
I am putting up the "Red Hot" Luke Scott for a team in need of a (1B,LF) player. I have too many 1B and they are all supremely awesome (Pujols, Swisher, Cuddyer & Scott)...
Kenny Powers' Mullet
what do u want in return?
BeastHammer, LLC
Korean Potato Eaters (Douche Bag)
I will trade you a bag of s$%t for someone you picked up three weeks ago and then talked like he was on your team all year(Beasthammer LLC - Luke Scott). Or better yet I will trade you Ramon Hernandez straight up. It would make no sense for me to do that, but hey I guess we are talking nonesense so what do you think? Luke Scott he of the one hot month. EVERY YEAR!!!
Kenny Powers Mullet
oh snap!
BeastHammer, LLC
Thank you, that was very informative and well received although I will have to take a pass on your bag of shit and Ramon trade offer. I don't remember saying I have had Scott the entire season but I don't see how that is relevant. Your team is so deep I'm not sure why you would even bother entertaining a trade. I noticed that Luke Scott is not quite putting up the numbers that your stud first baseman is for the season. Scott has 22 fewer hits, 7 fewer doubles and 4 fewer home runs than Fielder... with 107 FEWER AT BATS but you're right, Scott is just having a good month. I can also see why you would be talking shit about my player when your "ace in the hole" at the 1B, LF option is Matt LaPorta. Nice work.
When I say a player is available for trade and it is someone you don't want all you have to do is... wait for it... NOTHING. But instead you chose to be a D-Bag.
Kenny Powers Mullet
Oh even bigger snap! goooooooood laaaaawwwwddd!
NY Boobs (the league commissioner)
It always warms my heart...when two people who have never even met develop a hatred for one another. Sort of like me and Sarah Palin. We can have a league-wide vote on the idea of trading non-players (like a bag of shit), for players. I vote yes, and feel it can add a whole new layer of drama to the league. I think it's hilarious that this all started over an Oriole named Luke. Pennant fever is in the air.

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